22 Dec

S04 Forfeit: Season Four’s Greetings

Spoiler alert, Bret lost season 4 of Don’t Lose Your Headline!
Here’s his forfeit: Season Four’s Greetings.

Apologies for the awful phone sound quality- turn it up and grit your teeth. Baby.

Bret had to include the following references to season 4:

• Masturbating Gorilla
• Cheeseburger Doritos
• Phil covered in chocolate sauce
• A Handsome weeping boy
• Bret’s sex dungeon
• A Florida family member
• Chris’s Boobs
• Ghost Kangaroo

Here’s a transcript of the poem:

Continue reading

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30 Sep

DLYHL Comes to Acast!

Hello everyone!

 

Good news! We’re available in yet another way! Acast is a podcast platform which has become hugely popular. It’s another string to our terrible bow, giving you the listeners more ways to tune in. Acast has a nifty app for listening on the go!

Acast has the option of letting you have your podcast hosted there, or just being listed from where you currently host. We’re with Soundcloud right now and would love to hear of anyone else’s experiences with Soundcloud and Acast and the pros and cons.

You can get DLYHL from Acast right here.

Hope you’re enjoying season 4! The next episode is out on Monday as usual. Have you spotted any funny news stories we could put on the site? Send us a link!

We’d also love to get some random keywords from you that we can use for You Can’t Make It Up.

<Bret

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21 Sep

DLYHL Comes to Stitcher!

Hello everyone!

A little news post to tell you… well, it’s in the headline, appropriately. Stitcher is a website that collates podcast and radio content for it’s listeners, who can listen via the web or a mobile app.

Listen to Stitcher

Stitcher’s gaining huge popularity because it’s a fine way to discover new podcasts and make the listening experience feel a bit more organic, like a dynamic radio show. So, it seemed high time that DLYHL went into the light! Plus, we know that not everyone uses Soundcloud and iTunes. Choice is always nice. If you want to suggest any other platforms for getting the show out, drop us a message or a comment!

You can get to DLYHL’s Stitcher page through this link.

There’s also a widget. Look!

Hope that’s useful for you folks! We’ll keep pumping if you keep listening!

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13 Sep

Bret’s Dungeon

As per the last episode, I said I’d forward on the fan mail from Polnaya Fignya (Dizzy P) where he offered a rendition (or two) of my sex dungeon!

Captions are in Dizzy P’s own words:

red room of whut
“Phil says Bret’s basement looks like this…”

 

capuchin crypt, yep
“But really it is like…”

 

Defamation! What a thing to say about a Premier! At the very least, the skeletons would be nuns, not monks. I have some limits.

<Bret

 

(disclaimer, because God damn how did this become a running joke: I do not actually have a sex dungeon or any other form of cellar).

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14 Jun

In Memory of The Orlando Nightclub Shooting Victims.

The Orlando shooting is horrible. It is simply, and completely, horrible.

Orlando

The problem with doing Don’t Lose Your Headline is that we’re never quite sure how to approach the truly terrible stories. We come across a lot of very sad stories and we’ve made a decision to not include stories in the podcast if they are particularly disturbing, horribly tragic, or involve anything like murder or the death of innocent people. However, to simply ignore the Orlando Shootings feels wrong. We all want to comment on this and I have no doubt it will be mentioned in the next episode of the podcast.

I think the best way to proceed is simply with love and caring (no matter how trite that may sound). We make a lot of jokes about all sorts of folks, and the LGBT community has certainly been the focus of a joke or two. But we have never, ever done so maliciously or with intent to upset folks. If we joke about you, we love you.

Our heartfelt sympathies go out to the families and friends of those who so senselessly and tragically lost their lives in Orlando. For those who lived through it, I can’t even begin to understand what it must have been like and I can only wish you a healthy recovery, physically and mentally. Live well; it is the best revenge.

Life is to be celebrated, and with that in mind, the Orlando Sentinel is actually doing a lovely, positive thing on their website right now. They’ve listed all of those who were killed in the Orlando Shooting and chosen to focus on their lives, and what made them special in this world. I strongly advise everyone who sees this, no matter how far off in the future it is, to go to that website, start at number one, and read about every single one of the victims. Read about who they were, smile, cry and take them with you as a memory whilst you live out the rest of your life. They deserve at the very least, half an hour of your time.

Life is to be celebrated; Celebrate theirs. They were here. They were important. They were us.

Phil.

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27 May

DLYHL on Youtube!

You know what’s sad? Some folks might not know yet that DLYHL is on Youtube! Just a few vids so far, but more being added soon, with clips and excerpts from the best shows!

You know what’s even sadderer? Some folks might not know that DLYHL even exists! So these clips are a nice, quick way of sharing a snippet of the show with your stupid mates. Go on!

Ah, refreshing. Season 3 is coming soon!

 

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